Recently my daughter sighed heavily and shared how tired she was of cleaning, laundry, and career demands as she works from home. She is a single mom of a tween. I remember those days. Keeping a home running, investing in our careers, and keeping everyone on schedule is …well…mundane at best. 

Unless…you practice seeing the magic. This sounds cheesy as I type it. Sometimes we just need a good, long nap to improve our perspective. In my years of teaching the point of view in novels, we would often discuss the “lens” of an author or character in the book we were studying. 

Our “lens” as parents must be intentional, tweaked on a regular basis, and practiced. Why? Life really can be so mundane. We get tired. Bored. It is so easy to live in the future we create in our brains instead of being fully in the present.  

While my children were growing up, I journaled and tried to reflect often on each moment, milestone, and ordinary day. I didn’t want to “miss” it and I did not want to forget it. The truth – I was often driven by my to-do list and lived thinking about future goals and was a chronic worrier in my thinking.  

Practicing the habit 

Practice just for today to enjoy your child. Lay aside something and spend a few minutes …speak something you see in them that you love, play a board game or video game, ask them to take a 10-minute walk, and use the time to hear about their day. Practice being intentional with your teen for just 10 minutes. We can do anything for 10 minutes. Anything. Look for the wonder of who they are becoming especially if you have fallen into the pit of only seeing the things that drive you crazy. 

I was single again after a long marriage when my son was a tween. After a long day of teaching, I just wanted to go home. I decided that once a week, we would grab fast food and have a picnic. Nowhere fancy…sometimes even in a parked car. Still, one of my favorite memories as I had his full attention and he would share about the day or tell me something funny that happened. That tween is now 27 years old…it passes so quickly. Look hard for the magic. It is there. It has the power to change our life …10 minutes at a time.